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Step 5: Describe the Outcome


All narratives should end with demonstrated successes. Numbers can be helpful, especially with respect to community and economic changes.


Unframed:

The ABC Initiative training center is located at DEF Technical Community College, one of the seven sites that will ultimately have the training program and mockups. In addition to DEF Community College, mockups have been built at GHI Community College and JKL Community College while ABC Initiative is currently in the process of developing the program at three more sites: MNO Community College, PQR Community College and STU Community College.


How can it be re-framed?

Avoid lists of locations or events packed into tight sentences. Walk your reader through the collection of simultaneous activities and achievements rather than running through steps.


Re-framed:

One year after their first meeting, the members of the original strategic planning team attended the ribbon-cutting ceremony opening the first of seven sites to have high tech new training centers. The Initiative has also built new facilities at GHI Community College and JKL Community College, which are ready to serve 60 new trainees. Additionally, sites are at the planning stage at MNO Community College, PQR Community College, and STU Community College. These programs will train an estimated 90 new weatherization workers when classes begin in the fall.

The re-framed alternative is still complex, but it is more descriptive and uses simple action verbs.

Of course, your own success story might have more loose ends. A good story can end with a first set of successes followed by a vision for improvement through next steps.


Example:

Now that training has started at the first center, ABC Initiative is reaching out to community partners across the area to expand the program and train more workers, providing skills that will serve them well in the new, green economy.



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